Kuth, Rim.

God, can you hear me?

As much as you wish to hear from God, He wishes to hear from you.

Before you expect God’s presence, you must first give your own. Wait for Him in the morning, for a prayerful spirit is the spirit to which God will speak. 

Ministry — Intercession

To get from God and then give to others what we ourselves receive from day to day is the secret of successful ministry. Intercession is the link between our powerless and God’s omnipotence. 

- Power in Prayer

CHOICES

I can choose to let the future consume my thoughts, but I can also choose to enjoy and embrace the present. 

Message for Ruth’s head: Chill out. Quit yer daydreaming and focus on right now. If you can’t deal with now, how can you deal with later?

As life goes on

I want to live caring about others, not caring about they think of me, and remembering God daily. 

Life should be that simple, yet it’s THAT hard at the same time. 

WHO’S WITH ME? Please.. anyone?

I have so many of these situations:

I know I’m supposed to be doing homework (especially right now cause its major crunch time) .. but I go on Facebook and tumblr instead.

THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN THE BROWSER DOESNT LOAD and the internet STOPS WORKING

I can’t help but imagine God saying “Haaahh! No computer for youu! Go do your homework.”

and I’m like -_____-” Really.. seriously, that WOULD happen. FINEE God I’m too impatient to wait for this stupid homepage to load ANYWAYS.

End product: A really butthurt Ruth unhappily doing homework.

TEEHEHE BUT YOUTUBE WORKS.

Sleep: An old friend.

Sleep is nonexistent in my life. 

I’m not talking about the 5 hour period when my eyes blink between the hours of 2 and 7 am.

I’m talking about SLEEP: THE BEAUTIFUL REGENERATION OF MY BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT. 

I need it, MISS IT, love it, CRAVE it.. and can’t have it.

I AM FOREVER SAD. hehe just kidding.

But man, I really do miss it. 

Here I go, Here’s my life.

Homework ~ That moment you accept you won’t finish it and feel 10x happier. 

To accept myself as imperfect, what a success. 

Now off I go on a tangent:

I had a talk with someone I can’t EVER be thankful enough to have.

He basically told me to stop expecting so much from myself and from others. I’ve had rough times with friendships.. rough times meaning I’ve invested so much love and time into people and got nothing back and ultimately lost them as friends. Sad, but true. And after countless amounts of times of being walked on by people and taken advantage of.. well, I kind of gave up. I gave up on making more friends, I stopped giving people chances, I gave up on deepening relationships because I didn’t want to go through that again. I didn’t want to get hurt again. 

So I started judging people and thinking so highly of myself .. for a LONG time. And i’m still fighting to change. But hey, change is a LONG process.

SOO. He basically gave me some tough love and asked

“Ruth, are you happy with your life?”

And my answer was so easy.

“No.” 

I mean, how did I get to this point in my life where I was so easily unhappy with life? When did I stop looking at life as something enjoyable? Instead I made it into something to accomplish. Something I have to do and prove myself worthy, prove myself as a hard worker.. I was living for myself. Greedy and selfish. 

So then he asked,

” Why do you keep judging people? Why can’t you accept them as they are? You aren’t HAPPY because you keep expecting these fantasy-outcomes in life that AREN’T happening, right? They’re unrealistic. Why can’t you just accept life as it is and ENJOY it? As a Christian you have to be the bigger person and honestly, that’s when the joy of the Lord fills you up. You don’t need anything from this life because once you’re gone you won’t take anything with you. Stop expecting love back from people. Why can’t you just give them love and not expect any back? Jesus does that for YOU. Why don’t you do that for others? 

You basically need to go with the flow and stop caring so much. Only focus on what matters and well, f**k the rest of it! Everything else doesn’t mean sh**!” 

So of course I cried from the beautiful truth of it all. The truth that has been hiding in the back of mind unable to free itself. The truth that I used to know and lived by, but somehow lost it’s way. The truth that has finally surfaced. The truth that I PRAY will stick with me. I miss Jesus. I want more truth. I want more of God. I want to live life free of it’s burdens and chains. Jesus already paid the price. It’s not my burden to carry. And WOW how much grace and mercy do we have to be able to say that.